Ah, So This is Life

The title lead me on a search for Claire Danes which lead to memories of how I enjoy her as an actress and naturally, because the search was on the internet, a couple of photos of her ass, which is very attractive, but I'll refrain from embedding the photo here because it has semen stains all over it.

What?

Oh come on (pun not intended), Natalie Portman has a lot more, but that's another story for another blog and this, well, this entry has has other ideas, really important (you may have noticed I have not been here recording any of the dirt, drama, or details much lately. If you know me, you know this babbling blogging life is not only about detailing the life, but it is also very much about distraction from life when life is frustrating or painful or depressing or whatever.

n the real world, this body has been giving me a lot of shit, literally. and I need to see a doctor about it but the appointment is in May, soonest I could get (I made it in January), so I've been to clinics and ARNPs and it's not helping so I need to try something else this week, another clinic I guess, but nothing can be done tonight so I am distracting myself, m'ok? Life has been the same otherwise, mostly good except living conditions which are the same as they've been for the year I've been here.

On that note, I found my new roommate. Unfortunately, he has been living, apparently happily, in Germany for the last three decades and does not appear inclined to move here, no less know me. That is, he doesn't know I exist, though he might, if he is curious and clever, or just bold enough to respond to the comment I left which went something like this:

At once I am, omg, that is, I am all at once, almost, gasping, laughing, caterwauling, and generous globs of generally sighing with excitement and dread, slightly annoyed with an alas and rolling of the eyes, but mostly a deep innate inherent unspoken kinship of some unexplainable sort that can only be explained by babbling incessantly uninhibitedly without regard for convolutions of verbiage, word constructs, language accords, or grammatical conventions, but simply and distinctly infinitely random free-associative mind dumping of the sort no planet has experienced in the history of the multiverses and beyond (never give up, never surrender, either).

I, the butcher of English, insertor of random blanks and erroneous titles, Queen Mother of Hypergraphia, and all my other momentary titles, not to mention the vast majority of my 100+ blog without any consultation or aforethought, salute you.

signed,
Kindred Spirit
(quite possibly)

Note: This entry may have nothing to do with the blog post under which it is submitted, it is, in fact, an instantaneous, impulsive, and quite ignorant reaction to the first impression of the first few moments of exposure to your blog and reading Note and About in the right column therein.

PS... My latest non sequitur or seriously irreverent regret in this life may just be that I do not have time to know you through reading your words and becoming part of your wasted life as much as I would like simply because I am too busy writing about my wasted life...

PPS... Nothing is ever wasted if it is appreciated.

PPPS... Thank you for being out there, here, or out here, there, for, for no apparent reason, I suddenly feel less alone.

Epilogue: This short script is as much yours as it is mine. Mine it as you will. Mind it as you wish. I love your madness almost as much as I love my own. Even if neither is ever known.

Someday we all will understand.

Till tomorrow,
Oui zusammenkommen in the middle
(I blame google and collins).

Namaste too.

hl,
ric

Imagine, someone who upon first (or second, at least, but who remembers how he got on my reading list that was accidentally up on the screen by a random sleep-click when I woke from Homer Simpson-like slumber in this chair last night and naturally, still there {on the screen this morning) glance, compels me to respond in such a fashion (see above) and declare with little forethought or assessment that he is the best candidate I've found for a roommate. I mean, imagine, right?

Perhaps I should introduce the unsuspecting victim of this particular post. Perhaps Emma will be pleased she is not the only one so unabashedly prostituted (or perhaps exploited is the proper term) by my insatiable lust for fame, fortune, and power. This entry, for instance, epitomizes the desperate hours I spend writing beyond any hope, a hypergraphiatic mania that fill much of the lonely time and keeps me from slipping into a funk, fugue, or other fucked up place/state. Hey, it's alliteration.

Perception is a fine distraction. Some weak story lines, mediocre writing at times, but the characters are interesting sometimes and the lead character and his affliction and decisions are sometimes compelling. The criminals sometimes give in too easily, but it's still got enough going for it, science and vulnerability and differences that gives it enough to watch again. Like Elementary an some other shows, it is a fine distraction for my mental reality.

This was going to be three different entries, maybe it still will, but the bowels and laundry and hunger and cooking and TV and loneliness and some other odds and ends distracted me and this window has been open for more than 12 hours, bt here is the essence of the party of the third part:

Still going back, I am, still going back every day. Like Oh wow, even. Every day. I return with renewed hope. Each time I open my eyes, I am reborn with hope for anything is possible and the one could be there, each time I open my eyes, there is hope someone will appear, someone who understands, someone who cares and connects and becomes part of the energy of the eternal infinity with me. Every day, I start again. Sometimes twice.

Blogger knows, I've been around a long long time (like dark ages time) when dark matter and dark energy were even darker than they are now.







Meanwhile, the day before today that didn't have an entry moved along like most, mostly at the desk, a meeting, the bathroom twice, the same results, then softball, 2 for 3, a single and a double. Later than intended because the message said the gave was 7:30 PM and it was actually 8:45 PM, so I did not get to the doctor that I was hoping to go to after work. Guess I was not supposed to go yesterday. Maybe Monday. Anyway, I stopped for food on the way home, juice, burgers, and probiotics. Random cures happen, there is always hope. Maybe I'll find a doctor tomorrow. Cooked food, franks and beans with onions and mushrooms and white castle burgers an lots of ketchup and juice... and today was a lot of bathroom trips so the combination was not good.

I need to finish the laundry and get some sleep.

This could have been better.

Narf :)