Choices Sometimes Suck

Tomorrow I hope to stop by the new place and give him the deposit and start moving stuff there. Without heat here, Shane the Insane (new nickname he just earned) bought an indoor propane heater. I don't think they are safe and so at 4 AM tonight I am still awake because I don't want to die of CO or CO2 poisoning in my sleep. I face my fears head on with completely open honesty. That's how I've lived happily for this long.

It would be funny if this was a sit com, someone dumb enough to burn a propane heater indoors. I don't care what it says on the box about being indoor safe, it's not designed to be a permanent heat source indoors and it can malfunction.

So anyway, I opened the window in my bedroom so I will have fresh air. Cold, but fresh. Stupid situation I've gotten myself into, but at least I have a way out and I should live through the night.
Trying to laugh it off.

I really do need some sleep. I have a lot of driving tomorrow and falling asleep at the wheel would not be a very good safety example for a safety officer. That's my humor, sue me (strange tongue-sticking-out bug-eyed smiley face, ya know?) Yes, I opened the window because, I mean, can you imagine the headline> County Safety Officer dies from carbon monoxide from an unvented indoor propane heater.

Ok, so maybe the propane risk is scary, but if we do not face our fears, we are victims of the mistakes they lead us to. If we do not face our fears, we give them more power and makes them more challenging to overcome. If we do not overcome our fears, we live and die afraid and diminish everything we could do. Fear prevents us from seeing clearly and making the best decisions.

So face your fears or fail.

The question is simple, do you want to fail?

I do not want to fail.

That is a simple choice.

If you hide your fears, you stop being honest with yourself.

If you are not honest with yourself, you are choosing failure.

It really is that simple.

I don't know anyone who truly actualizes this understand, but that doesn't change it's truth.

I keeping hoping there must be some who do.

I want you to, but that is your decision.

If you read this far, maybe you will.

It is your choice.

Narf :)