It's Not So Bad, Really

LOL LAM, if only you knew what I knew (if only you believed like I believed... there's an old song in there). I mean, just because I am dragging my feet on packing as well as I can for this move that starts tomorrow (though the bulk of the move is the next day when I pick up the truck, I pick up the keys to the new place and to the storage place tomorrow. Curly really did throw a monkey wrench into this life of leisure rather suddenly, alas. Sometimes we all have to be selfish no matter how much of a betrayal is may be to others. Ultimately, though, I chose to trust and depend on him (my mistake) and I curled up on the rug of his kindness, became lazy and complacent, and he reacted by suddenly cutting the indefinite stay in this space to thirty days and becoming a much more formal, impersonal, distant friend. Still, it's not so bad, really.

I mean, we could be in Trump's world where there a special government agency that's sole purpose is to police, pacify, and keep a specific race from causing problems or getting in the way. It is kind of an "FBI" just for a special kind of people based on the color of their skin and birth heritage.

Actually, there is a special government agency like that already. It's called the Bureau of Indian Affairs.

Whatcha think?

Meanwhile, I vegged all day. I fell asleep around 10 am after watching TV most of the night and then woke about 2 pm and got distracted by Facebook. The mood swung back and forth and the news of the world didn't help much, but expressing my opinions about the news of the world helped a little. Maybe lol. Kind of keeping my dream of saving the world alive just a bit.

Now, as night approaches and I am supposed to be trying to get a decent amount of sleep so I can really complete packing and get the stuff done I need to get done tomorrow, I am hungry and considering going out for some food because I don't feel tired probably because I am hungry and yet, the body did it's thing and turned all the extra calories I ate yesterday into body fat. Not a healthy cycle I am running these days (and for some time) because I am not running these days (and for some time) if you follow the trails of thought (and thoughtlessness) that surround me from within (yeah, heavy). The emotional stress of not being done with packing and the pending move does not help the focus on doing anything constructive, so whatcha gonna do about it?

Eat more unfortunate food, naturally. Yes, I am in the midst of a failure to communicate with myself and that is putting the hex on the several weeks of dietary sanity and sensibility that I was actively engaged in. The packing of stuff and having no food unpacked in the place contributes, but that is poor planning and laziness and disorganization and apathy on my part. And self-indulgence, don't forget self-indulgence. It is only a matter of time before I eat a cupcake again and die.

There is a voice calling out to me that has me laughing though, a voice that simply says oh be stupid for the week, so what if it slides us back a month, this is a major life stress this moving thing. Depending on another friend. Trusting. thinking so deeply about everything as we do, no wonder the train goes off the rails like this from time to time. The tracks are sell in sight, right over there, just next to the chocolate cream-filled long john factory and we'll be back on track before Rumpelstiltskin wakes up. Yeah, that's the ticket. Though I'd much rather find sleeping beauty, no offense to the Rumpels out there.

I am enjoying the roller coaster in spite of the stress, so sue me if you don't understand. Maybe the courts can explain it all better than I do.

Da Da Dahhh! The real work begins tomorrow.

Narf :)