Ok, so the previous entry was written this morning and the next entry will be written later today and this entry is being written in between and they are all dated different dates because I was away from here for three days and this morning I broke out of the mind-numbing funk to write and write and continue writing, babbling on as I usually do. The babbling prose is the free associative thought stream ever flowing through the brain cells (sometimes though, they don't make it up to consciousness and if they don't for a few days, they seem to explode like a volcano of sorts). It reflect and represents the unique pattern of associations and references shooting through the cranial that give me whatever personality I might have, be it ever-changing and random in some ways or consistent and predictable in others.
Rhymes, particularly, are the way I express emotion when I am in the flow. Usually emotions become rhymes before it comes out in prose. Rhymes seem kinder and less painful for me, though I do not know how they feel to the subject of a rhyme when there is an actual subject, or to the reader. Rhymes are not always personal or about someone in particular - often they are flights of fancy about imaginary people or places or things, but when emotion cuts or seers or lifts or excites, rhymes are my friend - no matter the feeling or subject, I almost always feel much better after putting it into rhyme.
For instance, for the record, in case it matters, for example, here are the blog posts for the past few days (not including the two daily blogs). You can decide for yourself just what sort of personality the writer might be experiencing this week. If you ask me, it's quite bipolar lol lam.
Anyway, that is some random writing information for those of you who just stumbled in, anyone who forgot, or for the few of you who need a refresher course in the methods of my madness. Here's an example out of the blue. I don't know just how random this youtube video might be here in this entry or whether it is left over from some previous entry or whether it was suppose to inspire some future entry, but here it is in or out of place and I won't even relate it to anything in this entry because I won't even click on it to find out what it is. It is just here.
Since I was not talking about Facebook, one of the reasons (of many) that I do not like Facebook is the hindrances to communication and contact the site provides. For instance, this Facebook Page received two page views a few hours ago (actually tomorrow, but what's in a date?). I see no way of finding out who viewed the page. I see no way of saying thank you or contacting the viewer in any way. So what's the point? Page views are what? Ego strokes? The number so many people think is so important, the page view is so meaningless to me. Perhaps the value is in money for people who are somehow being paid for each page view to their web page, but it is a meaningless statistic for anyone else. A sign of popularity? Empty applause? Are people really that shallow? Unfortunately, yes.
Sometimes recently I visited that interpals website and wrote this to someone:
Yeah you, a specific person, how odd for me today. I mean writing to a specific person. I used to correspond with hundreds of people and each letter was an individual message to an individual person, but over the past couple of decades my writing has been blog-style, generalized to anyone and everyone who might stumble upon the words I upload to the web. This is to say please forgive me if I slip into that mode as I attempt to remember my love of individual conversations in written words. Also, forgive me or not, I babble (as my profile can demonstrate). Mostly, I love playing with words (my inner child is alive and well and writing is one of his favorite playgrounds). Actual communication is icing (and I love icing even more than cake).
I have way too much time on my hands at the moment, so I decided to explore the online pen-friends world in the hope of finding kind hearts and open minds and from among them, a friend or few who appreciate communicating through written words. Your brief "About" inspired my smile. I admire brevity even as I love verbosity (I am so much more clever in my mind than I am when the words finally fall out of my head in massive missives, but I enjoy self-mockery and laughing at myself so much, I don't mind the strange looks and dismissive responses I often receive).
I appreciate the literary hug and send open arms back to you, with respect and no reference to Journey, romance, or expectations - other than sensing you'll appreciate lyrical references too. :)
Hopefully, if my babbling profile inspires your smile, this is the start of a conversation. If you'd like to keep it here on this site for now, I understand and will look for the site email letting me know I have a message. You can find me at candoor@gmail.com away from this site. If you do not respond, I wish you a happy and healthy life filled with love and peace and fun (and a balance of meaning and nonsense that pleases you).
hl,
ric
Interpals is a website for pen pals, people who enjoy corresponding. The site has a lot of people from all over the world looking to practice language skills, but I am hoping to find a few writing fools like me who enjoy sharing the babbling free flow of thoughts and other random or creative literary musings.
Other than all this, which is a whole lot of mental floss, I didn't do much today other than online job searching and watching internet TV. I wanted distraction. Jackson called twice and I didn't pick up. I texted her to let her know it was not a good day to talk. Some days are like that. I was also processing (and trying to understand) the changes she wants in our relationship and trying to make sense out of what she says and what she does and what she wants from me. IT can be confusing because the words and actions do not line up and I don't want to upset her, so I babbled and pondered and distracted and babbled some more. That is the process for resolving dischordant thoughts.
If you have not fallen asleep (or wandered off) yet, congratulations and thank you. You are welcome to communicate. You don't even need to wait for a pause, I'll stop babbling and respond as soon as I see the comment.
Keep your smile wide and your mind clear your way. Welcome to mine.
Narf. :)
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