The Last Three

So often creativity comes in spurts and even more often, spurts of three. Even when there is not much creative value, when there are three, the third almost always says something more, reaches deeper, defines, clarifies, and exposes more, in case it matters. I can only hope it matters to someone, somewhere, sometime. There's a place for us, if us ever happens to me.

Watching the X-Files, I imagine someone caring about me the way Scully cares about Mulder. TV fiction, certainly, but the emotion is the same whether it is portrayed by actors or experienced in real life. Loyalty, caring, trust, unconditional love. it is caring that does not need to be consummated sexually, it is caring that reaches beyond this physical life into the unknown infinite eternity. I know this experience because it is what I give, what I feel, and my experience in this life. All I've ever wanted is to find someone else who can and wants to share such an experience with me in this life.

I refuse to believe I am asking for too much. I can do it, so it is possible.

Scully: Did you find what you were looking for?

Mulder: No. But I found something I thought I had lost. Faith to keep looking.

It is not as if I find lines in TV shows or movies or print or anywhere that speaks to my core every day, but words can and do express virtually anything and the words in the End Game episode of The X-Files do just that. The Quixotic dream. I suppose we can associate most religious people with a similar dream. Believing something exists even when there is no empirical evidence. Mulder believes in aliens. I believe in love. Religious people believe in gods.

Could be revisiting The X-Files may rekindle the dream in me. Perhaps I should watch some other Random Harvest, Man of La Mancha, Tale of Two Cities, Les Miserables, Sleepless In Seattle, Jesus Christ Superstar, even. So many others. You've Got Mail,

So I find a POF (plenty of fish) email in my email and visit the site and expose myself (or something like that). yu can visit me there and see my profile and psychogical test results by looking up ricfish. Yes, I am ricfish on plenty of fish. So creative, aye? Here is my needs list according to their assessments.

Mulder, like so many TV heroes, can be so very stupid sometimes. Humans are naturally self-defeating, at least at the present stage of development, but TV heroes are especially self-defeating. It is necessary to extend the story. If stupidity was not written in, stories would not extend for a full hour, no less longer. Even though his room number is 42, he does not have all the answers. Even more, he makes stupid decisions that extend the story line for many episodes.

There was so much more . . .



Out there . . .

Narf :)