The thumb is high in the air.
If you don't intuitively know what the thumb guide means and do not wish to read The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy multi-part trilogy, well, you're just a dang fool, but make the most of it while you can because the thruway is coming through and the best we can do is not get in the way. Sure, most animals shit where they eat, but only one produces more shit that the house can hold and has the faculties to understand the consequences and consciously ignores reality and distorts facts so the self-destructive behaviors can continue. All for the love of power and money, but the power is fleeting and usually false and I don't care too much for money, money can't buy you life.
So there was softball. The usual blown game by the newbie Saturday team. The sad and frustrating part is they do not listen. I feel like a broken record shouting instructions. We lost, as usual. Te players don't listen to me at all and the guy who is coaching doesn't get them to listen either so they keep making the same mistakes and give the other team six to ten extra outs in many innings. Hitting is inconsistent, but it's not executing the fundamentals that give us no chance at wins. Maybe they'll do better next season. Then came shopping.
Ridiculously impulsive shopping. $561.38 at Costco and that's not all. Another $50 or so elsewhere, including a buffet dinner. All I wanted to do was kill time between softball and a party. Picking up some more protein drinks and a razor was all I stopped in for. I was hungry, but did not eat or buy food. I simply wandered the isles and one impulsive item after another leaped into the cart. 25 items, according to the receipt. Nobody was around to talk any sense in me, including me. It all became a landslide (or avalanche) of I could really use this in a new place. Yes, imagining (visualizing, even) myself in a place where I would actually use the kitchen and bathroom, storing stuff in each, well, stuff just jumped into the cart.
Details would be uploaded in the form of the receipt, but not only are receives inconsistently comprehensible, I don't have a scanner here, so let's oo at the highlights. The biggest ticket item was a 5 TB Portable Hard Drive. I know I have yet to fill the 1TB portable I have already, but everyone needs room to grow. That's the sales pitch I gave myself and I bought it for $119. The $30 in taxes can be split in your mind. Next up was a shower head for $40, dreaming of steaming hot showers. Then came a ten-pack of Brita filters at the same price and then a Ladies Raincoat and a Brita Lake Filter Container, each for $30. Yes, a ladies raincoat. I've seen it every time I go to Costco and av not seen a men's equivalent, so I finally tried on the XXL women's coat and it fit. I'll just have to learn to how to expeditiously zip it up.
Then came a six pack of bath towels for $24 (($17 after a $5 instant savings) and four cases (among other smaller orders) of Protein drink at $20 a case (one was $25, but was $20 after a $5 instant savings). There were Muscle Milk Light, the 100 calorie 20g protein drink and one Premier 160 calorie 30g rotein drink, but that one is going back for exchange because I accidentally bought caramel and I don't like caramel.
Remember when you used to get ell the little details of every little thing? (blink) . . .
Hopefully the unrestricted living did not set anyone up for a failed drug test. Let them know to inform your supervisor. The only chance of keeping a job is full disclosure of any and all drug or alcohol abuse. I brought the matter to the attention of the Manager (and boss might be settling it beyond that) and I have n idea where that line of thought came from, but it was there when I woke from a brief unplanned nap so I must have been writing in my sleep. Sounds like part of the Drug-Free Workplace training I do each month for new employees. I believe I was reading the Costco receipt.
Yeah, so then there the towels. I also bought two large beach towel for about $10 each, a 24-pack of hand cloths or about $12, and knapsack for about $25 but they are not on the receipt (wide-eyed stare of innocent wonder). I believe there was a box on the bottom of the cart that I forgot to run through the self-checkout and nobody noticed. Oh, whenever else could have been in there. The ethical dilemma is not knowing what else could be in there and having everything already repacked and stored away. The resolution is pat it forward and knowing I've given way more than I've received in this life allows me to sigh and accept the forgetfulness as a sign that Alzheimer's might have a few hidden benefits. Sense of humor. Ahem.
Back to the receipt now, there's a 3-pack of lanterns and a 3-pack of flashlights at $20 and $18, respectively, and there's two three packs of medium-large storage bins and one 6-pack of 12-QT storage bins, each for $17. I spy a cushioned bathmat for $10 and an umbrella for the same price. I have several umbrellas and I've used one of them once this year. It broke. The handle bent. It was a cheap $5 Home Depot umbrella. Don't buy the cheap $5 Home Depot umbrella.
I see a $20 pair of shorts. I do not recall buying a $20 pair of shorts. I recall a pair of shorts that was less money according to the sign it was under, so I will be checking on that when I return the caramel protein drinks. The shorts are not listed on the Costco website. The website ought to let you look up an item by the sku number. Especially since there are some items that are challenging (or not going to be) identify(ied) by the jibberish on the receipt. No excuses, the technology is certainly already on their in-store system.
Speaking of unidentified flying merchandise (I mentioned things just flew into the cart, right?), MikeHolmes is listed for $13. I have no clue. It was discounted $3 to $10 and just below a 2-pack of Apple Cider Vingegar that was $5.69 and just above a large bag of prunes for $9.39, though that doesn't help identify MikeHolmes at all. The NW 3OC SET is another unknown. 3 piece set of what? For $20, no less. I am scouring the memory and it remains a puzzle. The website is no help, a chaise lounge for $1200 appeared when I searched for NW 3PN SET. I did find the MikeHolmes item on the website, they are 2 work gloves that, after trying them on, will likely make satisfactory batting gloves and at $5 a pair, I should probably go get a few more if they actually work out. I'll try them Monday evening. Three 40-packs of purified water for $3 each round out the receipt, except for anything that wasn't on the receipt that I don't remember.
So I wrote to Costco thusly:
I understand codes are necessary fr computers, but "NW 3PC SET" does not identify what I purchased among 25 or more items on my receipt. When reviewing my receipt, especially if someone else is making the purchases for me, the receipt should identify what an item is and when codes are used, there should be a means of look-up available to a customer without returning to the store. I see there was a $19.99 charge for "NW 3PC SET" Can you tell me the item that was purchased so I can reconcile my inventory? Thank you.
Businesses need to know how to satisfy their customers. There's Sam's Club and BJ's and more out there, after all.
So this entry might finally be ready to conclude after three attempts to finish it and falling asleep and all that jazz. If you were here, you could have slept with me and enjoyed the babbling in-person and changed the world, but since you were not here. the world remains as it is, messed up beyond belief. Think about that.
Then, after shopping, the party for the mom of one of the regulars in our group, Polly (ten to twelve regulars, eight are in a constantly chattering text message group, sonewhere in the blog links is an old page introducing most of the regulars and let this stand as a reminder to remind me to remember to look into updating that page because posterity would want to know, in case it matters). Party, games, stuffed, tired, fun. Arriving back here, it took a half hour to unpack the car and the stuff. It's all in three new storage bins ready for the move. There are signs that I will do more re-arranging of stuff and packing for a move this weekend, we shall see what happens when I wake. Feeling the reality of moving again, at least in my mind, so I want to pack to be ready. If it happens, when it happens, so what's happening yaaas?
Narf :)
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