but I don't really think so
or it could have been I let go
if they is even possible
it may have been the memories
of starting school with birds and bees
or maybe I'm just climbing trees
. . . what is beautiful? . . .
Then Dan Hill came on with Sometimes When We Touch and wow, just wow, cuz you had to be there and if you don't understand, you might, but if you think you understand, you probably never will and if you get that conundrum then why don't we talk about it? Shy, perhaps, dull... or shut down so deep you appear insensitive or developmentally delayed to those who are aware and alive in this life, but that's ok if that is what pleases you. You might get another life and who is to say that deadening the senses and bloating the body by indulging in emotional eating is wrong?
that is making me lonely
or I could have been the only
living boy in this town
life is longer than this song
or anything in our minds
for in the end life just goes on
and leaves us all behind
Still I sat down here to write today before those songs began (and just iterjecting here after uploading, if you think this is long, well it might get even longer because I sensed it isn't finished when I uploaded it and here's one even longer just cuz distraction can be so much fun) so maybe it was listening to music play all night that brought me here to write to you as it is was my plan or maybe it's just Saturday and I just want to write (need to write to be alright) and rather by chance, perhaps, the music dies (or at last the sound goes off as it does from time to time on this laptop) and I get up to change laundry cycles and decide to switch from the marathon 15 hour session of semi-random YouTube music (seemed mostly quiet 70s and 80s stuff that was good for sleeping to) and I decide to seek music on Hulu and I looked at concerts and had many to choose from and after a bit of wandering and pondering I opened Billy Joel's Last Play At Shea and it was truly, as Billy said, a shared holy shit.
Wow. Oh wow. memories.
You could read about it (Extra! Extra! Read All About It (amazing memories there that only a small group of a few million truly understand) or you could just watch it.
Whatever, the roller coaster of emotion that started this entry has been hijacked by the video Last Play At Shea, another concert I should have been at but I left New York because I was tired of the cold in so many ways and yet when life begins in New York City, it ends there too whether the body is there or not. There is no leaving New York City when life starts there. I am not sure anyone who is not born there or spent most of their formative years there can understand this, but it is true nonetheless. The connection to Long Island for those who spent much life there is equally inseparable from the person who started life there and for the few who did both, city and suburb, Billy Joel holds the candle that will always burn.
I'll meet you anytime you want at our Italian Restaurant
We are all just children growing at different paces... whatever kind of mood we're in, there are a few of us who will always be connected to the experience, to that New York state of mind. I've spent time in LA and San Francisco, having lived in Monterey. I've lived in Toronto and loved it there, but again, the tropical body will seek the tropical climate. I've lived in the tropics (or semi-tropics, at least), for the second half of this lifetime and this body could not be happier (except for the missing runner's high, but there is hope I may feel that again too).
11 minutes to Shea...
...and Paul McCartney shows up to close music at Shea Stadium, so fitting, so magical as The Beatles brought music to Shea Stadium the year after the stadium opened. We can only imagine this would have been the Beatles reunion concert every Beatles fan and most music lovers always dreamed of if John and George were still alive. They should have invited Ringo.
Let it be... perfect.
Hulu follows this epic film (hey you choose your epic and I'll choose mine... after all, I know nothing's perfect but I used that word too... as Billy said to close the concert before the encore with Paul, don't take any shit from anybody and you better believe that is the way of the true New Yorker and anyone from anywhere who understands self-respect and being alive in this crazy world - if only egos did not distort that understanding and add cruelty to the fire... still stupid, even if we didn't start it... but anyway... epic).
Then, as if Hulu had other ideas, on comes The U.S. vs. John Lennon shifts the mood to a much more serious truth about the sickness in this country and I'll let it play in the background as I try to find my way back to the original thought that might have blossomed if the start of this entry was not so epically sidetracked in this epic way. Not that this is an epic entry, after all. Just think, we can put a man in jail for ten years for two joints while we - as a people - dropped the destructive power of two and a half Hiroshima bombs on people ten thousand miles away, people who we never met and who posed no threat to us whatsoever. Paranoia destroys humanity. We have a President now that could be as equally paranoid and controlling.
Stop.
looking for something to hate
lying about what some people say
pretending that's somehow great
Leaving behind the war and the wars and the hate and the stupidity (you know, there's room at the top they are telling us still, but first you must learn how to smile as you kill, and all that jazz) even as it seems to be (oh no) repeating itself today (but do we have a John Lennon today?) cuz like he said because society is run by insane people for insane objectives... if anybody can put on paper what our government and the American government etc and the Russian, China what they are actually trying to do and how what they think they are doing, I'd be very please to know what they think they're doing. I think they're all insane... but I'm liable to be put away as insane for expressing that. That's what's insane about it.
I have thought that many times.
The thing the sixties did was show is the possibility and the responsibility that we all had. It wasn't the answer, it just gave us the glimpse of the possibility. ~ John Lennon
Some are still back there, stuck fighting the wars, the same old wars for power and resources that humans have been fighting to control since people have existed. It is natural for any living being without the awareness of how self-destructive and ultimately futile it is if the goal of life is to live, no less to enjoy the time alive. You say you want a revolution? Well, you've been told many times before... The Who? lol how many got that one?). I sometimes forget that I have moved on, farther on. I forget because I want to share and that takes another person and getting close to other people means slipping into the collective consciousness of the times which is quite depressingly negative and self-destructive. Inside, however, I moved on from the current human condition in early childhood and that is why close intimate relationships do not last. I do not want to be superior, but peace is superior and I am at peace inside. I do not want to be better than anything, but love is better than anyone or anything and I am love inside. You can be too, you just have to do it, live it, be it.
Love is living love.
All we are saying is give peace a chance.
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