A group of friends who used to be like family a couple of years ago who I met through meetup board games groups have drifted off, splitting into factions over conflicts and judgments and except for a small group who are bound together by high levels of emotional neediness and some depression (and that is fine when I am in "therapist" mode but it is an unhealthy group of people to interact with individually when I am down myself because their personal interactions work on a 'misery loves company' foundation and that not only repulses me instinctively but it is annoying when I am seeking positivity. Not good for anyone when my patience is thin. Experiencing their rush of adrenaline when I am down is quite unpleasant {being an empathic child is not always fun}. I wonder if you know what I mean) and another small rather sedentary group who eat too much (especially of the meat fat snack food group) and play cards and games and do not do much else. Thank goodness for softball, even without real friends or a partner.
So while I really enjoy the cards, I need a new group of friends or at least one or more new friends who are more positive and the one person I've met recently is somewhat depressed herself after a 17 year marriage broke up so I seem to be finding it challenging to meet positive people and am coming closer to the conclusion that everyone in this world today is depressed enough to be more depressed than I am or ever get and maybe that is because my pool of people is older than ever or maybe it's me and that is a depressing spiral I really do not want to get any closer to than I already am.
Anyway...
That was moderately cathartic :)
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