Stopped for a 7-11 pizza for dinner which is a splurge for me these days. It gets closer and closer to the red line, financially, just about $200 away, actually, and that is a line I really did not want to cross ever again, but the purchase of the car on the basis of equal sharing of bills caused a crash in my financial empire (ha ha, you know?) when the equal sharing of bills never happened and in fact more expenses for taking care of Jackson and Happiness drained the savings even more... but we've been through all that too many times and the promises repayments have still not started so my safety net is depleted and my trust is broken and my heart is shattered and my liver is fatty and my kidneys are bloated with water sacs and my tubes are scarred from stones and my brain is tired and my muscles are not recovering well anymore and the whole world is going to hell in a hand basket and nobody really cares about me, but that's the life I've always known... we are a selfish lot, human beings...
What?... the laughter you hear is merely the madness of a child who never grew up and who refuses to take anything seriously unless held in his hands and she wants to be taken seriously... so far, he's been way too serious for anyone to stay in his hands... it's scary, feeling everything... the world outside my head cries... I am numb... laughing...
Reaching for distraction and comfort... a WaWa long john for dessert and the calories mount... the laptop is sweating... no air conditioning, age, death is coming...
would you like to swing on a star? :)
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