Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Rock Me Like a Hurricane?

That title comes directly from the title of brief version of the daily life in blogform, as a response no less, and may or may not have a whole lot to do with the song of similar title, geology, or the weather, even. Do we really turn to meteorology when we have nothing else to say and want a conversation starter?

Meanwhile, this is going to expand, so stand back (sing reference not intended).

I am here, I am here, I am here! No, not a Who down in Whoville, but come to think of it I am looking for my Horton who is looking for her Horton who is also looking for a partner to share everything in life. Yes, I seek the improbablem a relationship that spans the globe from the Horton (relatively omnipotent unconditional trust) to the Who (relatively completely dependent unconditional trust) to the majority of time being somewhere closer to the equal balanced partner. From infant to parent and everything in between on the spectrum of independence to dependence.

Not too much to ask, is it?

In keeping with the theme of shameless begging for attention in the hope the one or at least a or even some true friends might find me and find worth in all the words, I was here for many years and I hope those years are still valuable to someone because they meant so much to me from time to time (casual reverence, no doubt), but I am here (in case it matters) now, though for the moment I am (and here where you are reading. For more fun with words in the relative now (and still more words too), see here, here, and here {newly revised as an introductory reference {or warning?... well, let's call it a vital perspective for anyone wanting to get close to me for now} in case you actually want to know me, the author of all this. that is) as well. Of course there is one place to go for almost everything I put online so for a whole lot more to choose from, see here.

So I shall get dreassed and ready for softball in a few minutes and hopefully the other team shows up. My teams have had a run of forfeit wins lately. Perhaps we are just too good and nobody wants to play us. Or they are just not that into it. I woulnd't mind a cancellation so I do not have to go out. Our coach kinda sorta said she would be out there early because the team we are supposed to play has a double header and if they don't show up for the game before ours she might just say don't come out even though they could show up for our game and then we would be the ones who forfeit. I suppose this is a sign of how not fun Wednesday Night Softball is for me (and/or how apathetic I still get on what many call hump days), but I am just not a fan of the fields or the field management or the umpires or the mix of teams out there, Maybe everyone kind of feels the same, but it seems the whole evening is depressing and dragging along and no one is actually there to do their best and get excited and have fun. My skewed perspective, perhaps.

Anyway, I finally went to bed long after sunrise this morning after processing the footwear tragedy and distracting myself with much online wandering. The exciting news is if I drive out to the fields, I intend to stop at Kohls to see if they have the sandals I want in my size. Fingers are crossed. Toes, even. Dinner (or breakfast, since I just woke) will wait until after softball and should be very light. So what else is new?

I mean, besides blatant attention seeking? :)

Ah, I checked in with the coach and there is no game tonight, so the good news is I don't use any gas and I don't spend any money unless I drive over to Kohls but I don't particularly want to, not only as a cost savings, but because I am sort of wanting a long john (pastry) from Wawa and do not want to go near the temptation. Kohls is right behind Wawa in the same parking lot. Maybe I'll do laundry and finally get started on sorting through more boxes instead.

It is such a weird fielding to be conscious of the emotional hunger while also being conscious of the physical bloat while also being conscious of some actual physical hunger as well. I last ate almost 24 hours ago, after all. I got home from Curly's about six hours after we ate dinner (and I did not snack nearly as much as I usually do) and I spent the following 8 hours writing and wandering the web and not the least bit hungry in any way and then slept almost 8 hours and I've been sitting here for two hours feeling bloated, so it seems so natural to eat only when hungry and I often do not get hungry until a day after I eat a large meal. Maybe I am part camel. I do retain a lot of water.

I don't eat enough salad or fresh veggies or fresh fruits or fresh anything. I don't want to spent $10 on a salad out there and I don't have a sink or counter or kitchen here. I suppose supermarket prepared salads can be had for $5 or so. Still, that is twice as much as I spend on my meals at home, even from cans (and I can eat for less than a dollar a meal if I had a kitchen). If I go out to get the sandals I could pick up a salad... if I find the right mind set to avoid the sugar snacks I am craving.

I think I may be more the Neil Young Hurricane tonight. More spacey blown away than fiercely rocking in any particular direction. I just remembered that I missed the Wednesday Morning Softball with the seniors again this week. I forget each week and I get home late and wired from Curly's after Tuesday Night Cards. I won't be able to play Wednesday mornings if I get a full time job, but while I am not working that would be some additional exercise. If I get to play. If I do not slide into the slow moving low energy level of the older crowd. I have not found anyone I feel could be a friend yet mostly because they all seem so old and don't have much conversation I am interested in. I don't know if it is generational or an affect of retirement (some of the guys have been retired a long while), but mostly I think it is the low energy. They all want to sit a lot and the game moves so slowly, especially in the heat. Still, it is more outdoor activity with people and the chance for some more exercise.

I think I'll post this now and if more words flow later, post more later. Maybe I'll even consider correcting typos lol lam. I hope you enjoyed and enjoy your day, evening, night, and whatever time it is wherever you are. If you or you know someone who is into babbling silliness, positivity,a and a daily excursion into the wonderful world of emo just for the fun of it, please stick around (or let them know) and let me know what you are reading and what you think of it. Tell me about you. Maybe we're friends and neighbors (or want to be) and just don't know it yet. :)




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